One of my closest friends called to see if I wanted to join him for the Lady Longhorns NCAA Women’s Basketball Tournament game in Austin. That was an easy yes—I wasn’t going to pass up that opportunity.
The seats were solid, giving us a clear view of the court, and the arena was packed with Longhorn fans. Missouri State brought energy too, with a surprisingly rowdy section and a lively student band.
Featuring Bill Hader & Jenny Slate
via Comedy Central
In my forties, I ventured into the territory of asking a woman to send nudes for the first time. As our relationship progressed over a few months, our playful banter reached a new level. During a late-night texting session, we found ourselves sharing glimpses of our bodies, inevitably leading to a more daring exchange. Excited to receive a boob pic, I grabbed my phone, pulled my pants down, and snapped a photo of my penis.
Eagerly anticipating a response to a risqué photo I sent, I grew anxious during the wait. Doubt crept in as I questioned if I had mistakenly sent it to the wrong person. Reassured that everything seemed fine on my end, I couldn't shake the fear that she might not have appreciated the image. An hour later, a text finally arrived—a simple smiley emoji.
Puzzled, I pondered its meaning without ever seeking clarification. Although our relationship continued for a few more months and eventually progressed intimately, the ambiguity of that smiley emoji lingered, leaving me wondering about its meaning.
Several years back, I came across an article highlighting celebrities taking the wheel for Uber and Lyft. Notably, Deadmau5 found himself behind the wheel of an Uber, while Elwood Edwards, the voice of AOL's iconic "You've Got Mail," also has driven for Uber. Even U.S. Senator Ben Sasse and the legendary Shaq have ventured into the world of rideshare, with Shaq even going undercover as a Lyft driver. Just picture hopping into a car and realizing Shaq is your driver!
Sources:
https://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local/slideshow/Celebrity-Uber-drivers-163519.php
https://www.cnn.com/2016/11/14/us/famous-uber-drivers/index.html
https://www.cnn.com/2016/11/14/us/famous-uber-drivers/index.html
Sick of the city, Sam quits his job and moves to Minnesota, as far from humanity as possible. He sees the postman once a week and gets groceries one a month. After six months of isolation, someone knocks on his door. A huge bearded man is standing on his porch.
"Name's Lars,''the man says, "from down the road. Having a party Saturday. Wanna come?"
"Definitely," says Sam. "After six months out here, I'm ready to meet some people."
"Gotta warn you," says Lars, "there's gonna be some drinkin'."
"No problem: I can drink with the best of them," says Sam.
"More 'n likely gonna be some fightin', too."
"Well, I like people," Sam says. "I'll be there."
Lars starts to walk away, then turns back. "I see some wild sex at these parties, too."
"Not a problem," says Sam. "I've been alone for six months! Just one question, though: What should I wear?"
"Whatever you want -- just gonna be the two of us."
- David Priest, USAF
Source:
Maxim Magazine, OCTOBER 1998 #12 issue
Comedy Appreciation
Best line:
"If you were supreme, Brian Kemp Brett Favre Kramer, maybe you could live in a world that didn't threaten your sad belief that you were better than someone of another color. Let's go through history, every race of people has done it as good as Whitey -- Latinos, Asians, Blacks, every single one has done it. I will say this, Whitey did steal their ideas most of the time and make the most profit of it. And that's Critical Race Theory."
Big Maple wasn’t getting shook by an eagle. pic.twitter.com/Gjf4NLNW6F
— MLB (@MLB) April 6, 2018
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, The President of The United States @realDonaldTrump and the newest addition to his legal team Rudolph Giuliani 😐pic.twitter.com/Hxwg17Ih8i
— UnsilentMajority 🌹 (@The_UnSilent_) April 19, 2018
I think my lizard may have murdered someone pic.twitter.com/p6V7O6Ay2Q— izzy (@danisnobunk) March 5, 2018
What all men need more of in the bathroom... pic.twitter.com/V7brVgvqgZ— Christy St. John (@Christy_StJohn) March 10, 2018
To those that rock the iPhone X without a case...y’all cray cray!— Michael D. Dunn (@MDDunnPhoto) March 19, 2018
Give @RealDonaldTrump a brake, spelling is HARD! pic.twitter.com/1W1pGJqjNZ— Jimmy Kimmel (@jimmykimmel) March 22, 2018
hold my beer while i make my escape pic.twitter.com/59jICqpxyX— theCHIVE (@theCHIVE) March 26, 2018