The Einstein of Sex by Daniel Brook

After reading a review in The New Yorker about Daniel Brook’s new biography of Dr. Magnus Hirschfeld, I felt compelled to purchase and read the book. Why? I’m the proud father of a transgender 21-year-old woman who came out to her mom and me in high school. I didn’t react perfectly in that moment — I didn’t yet understand what she needed to hear. Years of reading and learning about sexuality and gender have shown me that identity exists on a spectrum, and much of that understanding traces back to Dr. Magnus Hirschfeld at the turn of the 20th century.

Daniel Brook’s The Einstein of Sex offers a vivid, accessible portrait of the German-Jewish physician whose groundbreaking work reshaped early 20th-century thinking on sexuality, gender, and civil rights. Brook follows Hirschfeld’s development from his Prussian upbringing to becoming one of Europe’s boldest medical thinkers. In 1896, Hirschfeld published his first gay-rights pamphlet asserting that sexual orientation existed along a spectrum — a radical idea for its time. Over the next decade, he expanded this view, proposing that every person carries a mix of masculine and feminine traits. This framework opened the door to thinking about transgender identity long before the language existed.

Brook shows how Hirschfeld’s science and activism were intertwined. He founded the Scientific-Humanitarian Committee in 1897, the world’s first LGBTQ-rights organization, and spent decades fighting Paragraph 175, the German law criminalizing sex between men. His pamphlet What People Should Know About the Third Sex appealed to logic, empathy, and justice, arguing that same-sex love was equally capable of purity and nobility.

In 1919, Hirschfeld established the Institute for Sexual Science, home to the first gender-affirming surgeries, a global research library, and a museum that became a celebrated Weimar destination. As a public figure, he appeared in newsreels, lectured worldwide, and used his influence to advocate for inclusion in the military, medicine, and public life.

His travels strengthened his belief that identity — including race — is relative rather than fixed. In exile, he observed how different societies placed him in inconsistent racial categories, reinforcing his view that race was a social invention, not a biological fact. This embrace of relativity, echoed in his theories of sex and gender, earned him the moniker “Einstein of Sex,” a comparison he accepted with some reluctance.

As Brook documents, the Nazis targeted Hirschfeld relentlessly, nearly killed him, destroyed his institute, and burned his books in 1933. Though his life’s work was nearly erased, his ideas endured. Hirschfeld’s message remains strikingly relevant as today’s debates over gender, sexuality, censorship, and rising authoritarianism mirror the tensions of his era. Brook’s book reintroduces readers to the Hirschfeld Scale, his insistence on the fluid nature of identity, and his belief in the dignity of queer and trans lives.

My verdict: The Einstein of Sex is well worth reading — whether you’re part of the LGBTQ+ community, an ally, or simply someone seeking to better understand the science of sex and gender.

Sources:

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2025/10/06/the-einstein-of-sex-stan-and-gus-heart-the-lover-muscle-man

https://www.amazon.com/Einstein-Sex-Magnus-Hirschfeld-Visionary/dp/1324007249/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1DZSRAE2IS7Q6&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.QLLohB_pvDrmg-I1BuKKiw.7TqeHSjRv92Wzasrb6bheZIs9pp5sX43q5OWoZ7IXls&dib_tag=se&keywords=the+einstein+of+sex+by+daniel+brook&qid=1763845313&sprefix=The+Einstein+of+Sex+%2Caps%2C130&sr=8-1

The Big Reveal: An Illustrated Manifesto of Drag by Sasha Velour

About eighteen months ago, I heard Sasha Velour on a Vulture podcast interview, and I was so struck by her ideas that I immediately added The Big Reveal to my audiobook library (long before I even made time to listen). The delay turned out to be worthwhile: The Big Reveal: An Illustrated Manifesto of Drag is not simply a memoir — it’s a richly layered exploration of drag’s history, theory, and the personal journey of one of its most lucid voices.

Velour traces drag’s roots across time and cultures, from shamans’ rituals to ballroom houses, and frames drag as a poetic force of resistance and reinvention. She interleaves her own journey — a child who experimented with gender expression, the drag artist she became, and the challenges she has faced — with scholarly research, archival finds, and vibrant illustration. She dissects the definition of “drag,” considers its colonial and transgressive contours, and asks: What does it mean to perform gender? How has drag historically been censored, embraced, or co-opted?

She resolves that if she made a quilt of drag, it would include pieces from "a stretched hide from a shaman’s tent, silk from Gladys Bentley's tuxedo, sequins from Divine’s wiggle dress, hair from RuPaul’s wig. Each of us is just a small fragment of a larger picture, whether we admit it or not.”

And the core revelation: “Sasha Velour was made like a quilt … it took community to finish me up, weave me together, see me as whole, and push me out into the world.”

Velour’s view of drag is expansive: inclusive, messy, and always part of a larger conversation about queerness and art. Her prose is incisive without being academic, accessible without flattening complexity.

BookTrib calls it “a quilt, piecing together memoir, history, and theory into a living portrait of an artist and an art.” The L.A. Review of Books notes its timeliness in a moment of rising political attacks on drag culture. 

As a parent of a trans woman, the book enriched my understanding — not by preaching, but by opening new frames of reference through historical depth and personal honesty. After I listened, I bought a copy for my daughter immediately. 

My verdict: The Big Reveal is worth your time — part manifesto, part archive, part love letter — and, for anyone wondering how drag fits into queer history, it functions as a kind of essential textbook.

Sources:

https://www.vulture.com/2023/04/sasha-velour-on-drag-bans-rupauls-drag-race-predictions.html

https://booktrib.com/2023/04/06/the-big-reveal-sasha-velour/

https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/among-the-rose-petals-queer-possibility-on-sasha-velours-the-big-reveal/

James Baldwin: The Messenger We Still Need

Literature Appreciation

A few years ago, I read David Leeming's biography of James Baldwin, a prominent author who was both prophet and participant in America's racial struggles during the 1950s and '60s.

Leeming shows Baldwin as a witness—an artist who carried Harlem in his bones and Paris in his passport, constantly navigating between cultures while writing with urgency about race, love, and belonging. Novels and essays like The Fire Next Time argue that America's "race problem" stemmed from fear of love and the invention of categories—Black, white, gay, straight—to avoid self-reckoning.

The book captures Baldwin's contradictions: fiery yet tender, deeply committed to justice yet elusive in his personal life. Reading Leeming, you get the sense that Baldwin saw his role less as a polished novelist and more as a messenger, always wrestling with the truth as he saw it.

Louis Menand's essay in The New Yorker adds another dimension, reminding us that Baldwin's influence wasn't simply literary but existential. Menand emphasizes Baldwin's relentless message—that America's divisions are less about policy and more about our inability to love ourselves and each other honestly. He highlights Baldwin's struggles: the failed relationships, the disappointments in later work, and the way he drifted from celebrity status to "has-been" before being rediscovered in our time. For me, that lens makes Baldwin even more human—less the flawless icon and more the flawed, chain-smoking, often embellishing witness who refused to stop reminding us of the fire next time.

Taken together, Leeming and Menand leave us with more than a history lesson. They leave us with a challenge about how to live in our own politically charged moment. Baldwin's life, messy as it was, insists that labels won't save us, policies alone won't save us, and that real change begins in how we see—and love—each other. It's a reminder to take ourselves a little less seriously, to laugh where we can, and to not let fear or division dictate our choices.

 

Sources: 

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2025/08/18/baldwin-a-love-story-nicholas-boggs-book-review

https://www.amazon.com/James-Baldwin-Biography-David-Leeming/dp/1628724382

Sayaka Murata

Literature Appreciation

Born on August 14, 1979, Sayaka Murata (村田沙耶香) is a Japanese writer originally from Inzai, Japan. Her father served as a judge and her mother was a homemaker. Murata has described her childhood as unhappy -- she was shy, lonely, and began writing at age 10, drawing inspiration from science fiction and mystery books borrowed from her brother and mother. Her mother bought her a word processor in fourth grade after she attempted to write a novel by hand. After completing middle school, the family moved to Tokyo, where she graduated from Kashiwa High School and later studies art curation at Tamagawa University. 

Murata debuted with the novel Junyū (Breastfeeding), winning the 2003 Gunzo Prize for New Writers, and subsequently earned the Mishima Yukio Prize, Noma Literary New Face Prize, and Akutagawa Prize for Kombini ningen (Convenience Store Woman) in 2016. Her style often merges everyday realism with speculative or dystopian elements, unflinchingly exploring taboo subjects such as asexuality, adolescent sexuality, and reproduction technologies. 

In a recent The New Yorker article, Elif Batuman profiles Murata's unique worldview -- what Batuman calls "defamiliarization," using science fiction to reveal the absurdity beneath everyday life. Murata is depicted as an outsider who treats the world like an aquarium -- examining it with emotional distance and analytical clarity. Batuman highlights Murata's speculative work Vanishing World, a fictional universe where sex is replaced by artificial insemination and communal parenting -- an inquiry into biological norms and societal expectations. Vanishing World polarizes its audience -- readers either embrace the chilled speculative vision and its shocking climax or find such extremes off-putting. 

ai generated, based on Vanishing World

Sources:

Wikipedia

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2025/04/14/sayaka-muratas-alien-eye 

https://japanincanada.com/sayaka-murata/

https://www.wired.com/story/writer-sayaka-murata-inhabits-a-planet-of-her-own

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2020/oct/09/sayaka-murata-i-acted-how-i-thought-a-cute-woman-should-act-it-was-horrible

https://eliflife.substack.com/p/the-scambusters

https://www.patreon.com/posts/sayaka-muratas-126334276

Reading “They” from a Bird's Eye View

While lounging at the Delta Sky Club and waiting for my flight, I picked up a copy of The New Criterion—a conservative publication not typically on my nightstand, but hey, travel invites a bit of curiosity. An article by Joshua T. Katz caught my attention, especially as a parent of a transgender daughter. The piece? A critique of children’s books centered on gender pronouns.

Going in, I reminded myself to keep an open mind. Katz, a new father himself, shares concerns about books like The Pronoun Book, which introduce pronouns that don't align with traditional notions of biological sex. He worries these stories mix imaginative play with ideology and muddy the grammatical waters too early in a child’s development.

And from an education standpoint? I get it. Teaching sentence structure is tough enough before throwing neopronouns into the mix.

Katz’s broader point is about language itself. He argues that personal pronouns are critical building blocks of communication, and sudden shifts—especially those driven more by culture than linguistic evolution—can complicate things unnecessarily. One compelling example: changing “Do you live here?” to “Do they live here?” might sound inclusive but could confuse young learners trying to pin down grammar basics.

I don’t agree with everything Katz says, but I respect his call for balance. He urges parents to be mindful—not dismissive—of the materials they put in their kids’ hands. Respect and inclusivity matter, yes, but so do clarity and developmental readiness.

No matter your politics, it’s worth a read: https://www.aei.org/op-eds/pure-episcopalianism/

Andy Landorf and John Colquhoun, 2019

Sojourner Truth

Subscribing to hardcover magazines in the digital era presents a challenge. Before the internet and social media, receiving a magazine in the mail was exciting—a moment to savor. Now, a magazine might be flipped through once and then set aside, waiting for a "later" that rarely comes.

Case in point: an issue of Smithsonian sat on my nightstand for a year before I finally found time to read it. When I did, one story stood out—Cynthia Greenlee's article, The Gospel of Truth (Smithsonian, March 2024). The piece explores the life and legacy of Sojourner Truth beyond the widely recognized phrase, “Ain’t I a Woman?”

Greenlee highlights Truth’s complex identity as an abolitionist, women’s rights advocate, preacher, and strategist who actively shaped her public image.

Born enslaved as Isabella Baumfree in New York in the late 1790s, Truth endured multiple sales, harsh treatment, and betrayal before walking away from enslavement with her infant daughter. She later made history by successfully suing for the return of her illegally sold son, Peter—one of the first legal victories of its kind by a Black woman in the U.S.

A deeply religious person, she changed her name to Sojourner Truth in 1843, dedicating her life to preaching and activism.

While her 1851 speech at the Ohio Women’s Rights Convention cemented her legacy, Greenlee reveals how her words were later misrepresented. The famous refrain “Ain’t I a Woman?” does not appear in the earliest accounts. Instead, Truth’s actual speech likely centered on women's strength and biblical arguments against gender-based oppression.

Her activism extended far beyond that speech. She advocated for land grants for freedpeople, challenged segregation on Washington D.C.’s streetcars, and even met with President Lincoln. She also used photography strategically, selling portrait cards with the tagline, “I sell the shadow to support the substance.”

Greenlee’s article also explores modern efforts to honor Truth, from statues and memorials to an upcoming documentary. More than a historical figure, Sojourner Truth was a self-made icon who understood the power of shaping her own story—an inspiration that endures today.

Read the full article HERE.

Photo by Maddie McGarvey

Source:

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/remarkable-untold-story-sojourner-truth-180983691/ 

Vad Mehta

I came across a beautiful article by Sage Mehta in The New Yorker regarding her father, Vad Mehta,  a prolific American writer, who passed away January 9, 2021.

Ved Mehta's life and work defied conventional limitations. In The Sighted World, his daughter, Sage Mehta, reflects on growing up with a father who, despite being blind since childhood, navigated the world with precision and confidence. She describes how he structured his home environment so meticulously that he rarely needed assistance. His blindness, though a defining aspect of his life, was something the family seldom acknowledged. Outsiders often marveled at his ability to move without aid, yet his independence was the result of rigorous adaptation and an extraordinary memory.

Born in Lahore on March 21, 1934, Mehta lost his sight at age three due to cerebrospinal meningitis. Determined to receive an education, he moved to the U.S. in 1949 and attended the Arkansas School for the Blind. He later studied at Pomona College, Oxford University, and Harvard, where he developed his literary voice. 

His career took off when he joined The New Yorker in 1961, writing extensively on philosophy, politics, and culture. Over three decades, he crafted a distinctive narrative style that blended memoir with journalism, culminating in works like Fly and the Fly-Bottle (1962), which explored intellectual debates among British thinkers.

Mehta’s Continents of Exile series—his most ambitious work—spanned 12 volumes, chronicling his life and the experiences of his family across multiple continents. Beginning with Daddyji (1972), which detailed his father’s life, the series wove personal and historical narratives together, capturing themes of migration, displacement, and belonging. 

Despite his literary success, his personal relationships were complex. His dependence on young assistants, known as amanuenses, sometimes led to discomfort and allegations of inappropriate behavior. Sage Mehta acknowledges both his brilliance and the challenges of being close to him.

As he aged, Parkinson’s disease gradually diminished his physical and cognitive abilities. His once sharp mind became clouded, as if retreating into the past. When he passed away in 2021, his family scattered most of his ashes in places that had shaped him—Maine, Oxford, and India—but some remained in a wooden cube called the “Statesman” in his wife’s new home. 

His legacy endures in his literary works, which continue to offer insights into identity, exile, and the resilience of the human spirit. 

Sources:

Wikipedia

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2024/10/14/growing-up-with-the-writer-ved-mehta

The Obsession with Capybaras

I recently came across an article by Gary Shteyngart in The New Yorker that examines the global fascination with capybaras, the world’s largest rodent. Native to South America, capybaras are closely related to guinea pigs and chinchillas. They thrive in savannas and dense forests, always near bodies of water. As highly social animals, they typically live in groups of 10 to 20.

Shteyngart’s article follows his journey across the world, exploring the various ways humans interact with capybaras. He captures the growing obsession with these gentle creatures while also raising deeper questions about our relationship with nature. Whether as internet celebrities, emotional support animals, cryptocurrency mascots, or even political symbols, capybaras have found a unique and unexpected place in human culture.

Read the article HERE. 

Source:

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2025/02/03/how-the-capybara-won-my-heart-and-almost-everyone-elses

I before E except after C

I before E except after C. That's what I remember learning in grade school. While this guideline was intended to help in spelling, as I got older I began noticing exceptions to this rule. Words like "weird", "foreign," and "caffeine" defy this principle, showcasing the inherent intricacies in the language's spelling patterns. 

by Dan Piraro (Jan. 9, 2014)

Testosterone

As I age, my interest in men's health grows, with a particular focus on testosterone. This hormone plays a pivotal role in mood, stamina, and notably, sexual function.

Over the recent months, I've delved into my collection of old Playboy magazines dating back to my high school years. While initially obtained for the photos of beautiful women, these magazines turned out to be a treasure trove of insightful articles, interviews, and columns.

Among these pieces, I came across an article by writer Jon Krakauer. This article explores the intricate interplay between testosterone, its effects on the body and behavior, as well as the use of anabolic steroids, shedding light on their potential risks and benefits.

Krakauer emphasizes the potency of testosterone as a hormone that profoundly shapes masculine attributes and influences men's cognitive and emotional realms. He notes, "A guy with a lot of testosterone flowing through his veins will have brawnier muscles, sturdier bones, less fat and a healthier heart than someone with a low testosterone level. The former is also likely to have more energy, a better mental outlook and a greater sex drive."

The author points out the conventional attribution of negative male behaviors like aggression and anger to testosterone. However, he highlights a study from UCLA that challenges this stereotype, asserting that, "The big bad male hormone actually induces feelings of calm, well-being, friendliness and optimism. It turns out that the negative behaviors with which it has long been associated -- anger, violence, irritability -- are caused not by a surplus of testosterone but rather by a shortage of it." Hence, behaviors previously associated with testosterone might actually stem from its scarcity rather than its excess.

Krakauer delves into the realm of athletes employing anabolic steroids to bolster their performance. Across diverse sports, these substances have been used to enhance speed, strength, and endurance, yielding improved outcomes.

While steroids can facilitate heightened metabolism, increased fat reduction, accelerated protein synthesis, swift post-workout recovery, and expedited healing of select injuries, health hazards loom. Potential risks include hampered bone growth in young users, liver damage, elevated blood pressure, acne, testicular atrophy, and hair loss.

Krakauer proposes natural alternatives to synthetic steroids, with a focus on intensive strength training to stimulate testosterone production. He draws on other studies, suggesting the need for a balanced exercise regimen and sufficient recovery time to optimize testosterone synthesis.

"Although high-intensity strength training produces the greatest testosterone boost (while increasing production of other beneficial muscle-enhancing hormones such as human growth hormone), it is important not to overdo it. Research shows that hormone levels peak after approximately 90 minutes of hard exercise and then drop precipitously -- in many cases to a level lower than before the workout began. And insufficient rest between sessions can be similarly counterproductive."  

Source: PLAYBOY, November 1995, Vol. 42, No. 11, pg. 33.

"Men are Still Wrong" by Cynthia Heimel

Literature Appreciation

My girlfriend and I dressed in pink as we joined the throngs of people at the local theatre to watch Greta Gerwig's Barbie. The film, a box-office smash, evoked nostalgia as it reminded me of my younger years while also highlighting feminism front and center. In Barbieland, a women-centered utopia, Ken dolls are rendered useless until Ken witnesses the real world's patriarchy and returns with that ideology to rename Barbieland as Kenland.

Coincidentally, I stumbled upon an article by Cynthia Heimel from the August 1994 issue of Playboy titled "Wrong Again." In her column, she addresses the ongoing tension between feminism and the male backlash against it. She observes the ever-shifting nature of the backlash from feminism to a male backlash against feminism, followed by a feminist backlash against the male backlash, and now a perceived male backlash against the feminist backlash. Cynthia expresses frustration with this cycle of blame and whining, which only fuels the frustration between the sexes and perpetuates conflict.

Cynthia highlights a new trend in feminism, an anti-victim feminism, which rejects victimhood and emphasizes personal empowerment and action. While she acknowledges that there are genuine victims among both men and women, she criticizes the blame game and suggests focusing on punishing whiners rather than actual victims. She urges praise for those who rise above abuse and oppression and fight back against their oppressors.

She points out the irony that men and women essentially desire the same thing: more equal and modern relationships free from traditional gender roles, "There is a fabulous irony in this battle between men and women. We are on the same side." Both genders face their own grievances—men feeling used and financially drained, and women facing discrimination, inequality, and objectification.

For progress to happen, Cynthia argues that both men and women must make sacrifices. Men should let go of control in relationships and workplaces to allow women to become equal partners. Women, on the other hand, should stop manipulating men and demanding material things, while also taking on equal responsibilities and opportunities.

"We all want it both ways. It won't work. We must make sacrifices... We must be prepared to shoulder equal burdens or sacrifice all rights to equal opportunities. If a mate demands that we impersonate an inflatable doll, just say "Get a grip."

Fast-forwarding thirty years, it is evident that we are still grappling with feminism and equality of the sexes. Sadly, some individuals resort to extreme actions, like a political pundit who, as a grown man, purchased Barbie dolls just to set them on fire in a misguided attempt to criticize the movie as being "woke."

Source:

Cynthia Heimel. Wrong Again. Playboy Magazine. August 1994. vol. 41, no. 8

https://www.nbcnews.com/pop-culture/movies/internet-roasting-ben-shapiro-hate-watching-barbie-dressed-ken-rcna95843

"Sex and How to Get It" by Cynthia Heimel

Literature Appreciation

While flipping through an old PLAYBOY magazine, I came across an article by columnist Cynthia Heimel. Actually, I'll be honest, the title "Sex and How to Get It" was what caught my attention. 

The American feminist and humorist writer was known as being the first to have a column in PLAYBOY that focused on women. Heimel's main focus was sexual self-confidence for women and the idea that women enjoy sex.

Born on July 13, 1947, Heimel started writing for an alternative magazine in the late 1960s called Distant Drummer. She then worked for numerous publications including Penthouse Magazine, New York Daily News, The Village Voice, Vogue, and then PLAYBOY.

In her column, "Sex and How to Get It," she shares a conversation with the Editorial Director of Playboy, where she mentions her active sex life. The editorial director suggested Cynthia write about it, but she is hesitant due to potential negative reactions from certain readers, and expresses frustration that woman's magazines, at the time, frowns upon such openness in using explicit language when discussing sex.

"I want to just casually call it fucking, but I can't bring myself to. I would have no problem using it in a women's magazine, but none of those prissy women's magazines would let me."

Cynthia digresses to describe a disappointing experience at a male strip show they attended with a friend. Although she appreciated the male performers for their physique, she found the women's reactions to be off-putting and not genuinely arousing.   

"It was the women who were hideous. Shrieking. No, more like keening. If they had been one decibel higher only a dog could have heard them, but no. It was like being at a Beatles concert in 1965, only louder. Loud enough to split my head open, maybe. But were they turned on? Nope. They were letting off steam... If a stripper touched her on any part of her body, she shied away, which is quite the paradox. Women supposedly screaming in lust were still loath to let strange men grope them." 

She adds how men who go to strip clubs sit quietly with hard-ons, different from women. She explains that men are turned-on easily without knowing who the woman is. She adds that woman, like herself, are turned on more when a man fits their interest.

"The men who go to strip clubs are pretty quiet, sitting there with hard-ons. They really are turned on. They want some lap dancing. They don't much care who the woman is, because those auxiliary sex glands in their eyes take over. Women have to know a guy."

Cynthia anticipates receiving negative letters from readers due to her use of explicit language in her column, recalling a past incident where she received verbal abuse from hostile readers after Playboy Men Columnist Asa Baber shared a fantasy. 

"Once Asa Baber wrote about how I gave him a blow job at a restaurant. I remember reading his column and getting dizzy with shock. At the end he confessed it was a fantasy, but by then it was too late. Many dumb hostile guys didn't read to the end."

Despite concerns, Cynthia reveals her strong sexual desire for her current partner, Andrew. They cherish the intense moments of passion they share, emphasizing that nothing compares to the feeling of being sexually intimate, and she hopes Andrew will be supportive and not say anything hurtful or foolish regarding her openness about their sex life.

Source: 

Wikipedia

Heimel, Cynthia. "Sex and How to Get It." PLAYBOY, vol. 43, no. 1, January 1996, p. 33.

"Hallowed be thy Condom" by Asa Barber

Literature Appreciation

These past few months, I've been going through old PLAYBOY magazines. 

I came across an article that I remember reading back when I was a college freshman. "Hallowed be thy Condom," read the headline. The article was by Asa Barber, American author and columnist for PLAYBOY.

Although, I wasn't sexually active, when I was young, the fear was ever so present of the possibility of catching AIDS. AIDS was a fairly new and unknown thing. So, I share Asa's fears in his article: 

"But at the top of my list of manly trepidations are two items that can move my lecherous little heart into genuine arrhythmia. First, I never want to get a woman pregnant unless we both agree to it. Second, I do not want to die of AIDS. (It's common knowledge that AIDS is also a problem in the heterosexual community.) Those are probably my two biggest fears, and I have had frightening and enlightening experiences with both of them."

Reading this as a middle aged man, the article still somewhat resonates. After my divorce, I started dating. Sex was plenty and I was doing quite well for myself. But the first few years, my fear was AIDS and getting a girl pregnant. 

Like Asa, I had first hand experience sitting at my physician's office waiting to be tested for AIDS and other STDs after whoring myself, sleeping around with multiple unknown partners. And like Asa, I cried when results came back negative.

"When I was told I was HIV-negative, I felt like crying. I have dodged lots of bullets, but this was one of the biggest."

At the age of 40, I got in a relationship with a girl I was very much in love with at the time. It turned out she was mentally ill, and I knew a child with her would be the wrong thing for both of us. Yet, we had several close calls.

Like Asa, an unwanted pregnancy, which almost became a reality was a "major-league fear."  

I thought it through and made the decision to go in for a vasectomy. It was a decision I made on my own. Naturally, my girlfriend was upset. But I explained that I didn't want a child and wanted to focus on "us," leaving out that I felt she would be mentally unfit. Needless to say, the relationship didn't work out. 

Although impregnating someone was now impossible, I still had that fear of catching not only AIDS but other sexually transmitted diseases. Ironically, my current girlfriend, who I hope to be engaged with, had a hysterectomy, and has HSV. Go figure. 

But I will finish with sharing conclusion about the wonderful invention of the latex condom: 

"When you think about it, the latex condom is a marvelous invention. But most of us often fail to use it. We assume the interruption is not worth it. But I have learned, in two terrifying incidents, that the few seconds it takes to fit Mr. Happy with good protection can make all the difference in the world between responsibility and foolishness. So let this be your first commandment for the rest of your sexual life, amigos: Hallowed be thy condom."

Source: 

Wikipedia

Barber, Asa. "Hallowed be thy Condom" PLAYBOY, vol. 41, no. 11, November 1994, p. 36.

Why We Need Smokers, Drinkers and "Fuckers"

I came across an interesting essay by American novelist Bob Shacochis, published in the August 1994 edition of PLAYBOY, that argued for the need of drinkers, smokers, and adulterers, "If Charles Darwin was correct, smokers, drinkers and libertines are doing the species a favor, accelerating the biological quest for perfection." 

Perhaps satirical, Shacochis implied how easy it was to live on the edge "drinking, smoking, and screwing" before the "priggish, middle-aged nation of naggers and health harpies" of the 80s and 90s. 

Reflecting on this, I would agree with Shacochis that, although drinking and smoking was not unusual and far from vice, sex became serious, and rightly so. AIDS was a new thing and people feared having sex -- protected or unprotected. And if they did have sex, they wouldn't talk about it as openly as perhaps today.

He acknowledged the futility of defending smokers, drinkers, and "fuckers." But added, "... who wants to live in a world without them, without their libidinous hunger, without their exalted obsessions? They take the joy and sometimes the pain of living to the very edge and shot back instructions, dire caveats, titillating weather reports."

 

PLAYBOY, August 1994, Volume 41, Number 8

What happens when reading Maitland Ward's Rated X

Leo Garel, PLAYBOY (August 1994) 

Reflecting on a 30 year old Article on Ticketmaster's Anti-competitiveness

In fall 2022, Ticketmaster was in the headlines after its website were flooded with Swifties attempting to get tickets to their favorite singer, Taylor Swift.

This led to two lawsuits filed alleging Ticketmaster engaged in "fraud, price-fixing, and antitrust violations" and "anticompetitive and misleading conduct."

This is nothing new for the ticket giant. In 1994, a congressional subcommittee brought in those in the music industry who testified on Ticketmaster's anticompetitive ticket pricing and service charges without considering an artist's input. 

Music critic Dave Marsh wrote a column highlighting the subcommittee hearing in the November 1994 issue of PLAYBOY magazine, which he attended and represented ticket buyers.

In the column, he explained 90's alternative rock band, Pearl Jam, filed a complaint with the Justice Department's antitrust division regarding how Ticketmaster "had prevented them from touring... by refusing to meet the band's ceiling price for tickets at $18, with a service charge of $1.80." Equivalent to $40 (2022).

He continued, "Their complaint centered on both a major business matter -- the rising cost of concert tickets -- and important First Amendment issues. From an artistic point of view, if there are no alternate venues or competing tour sites, there is no free expression. Whoever owns the stage calls the shots," and adds, "Ticketmaster has an ironclad cartel."

Ticketmaster's counsel argued that it doesn't set the ticket price or service charges and... "They are determined through negotiations with Ticketmaster's clients."

Dave Marsh does raise a good point that still resonate today. We are customers and we should have a say in pricing. However, because of Ticketmaster's strong hold in the market, the people's voice is not heard.

Unfortunately, I feel nothing has changed in terms of congressional oversight over this matter. Like 30 years ago, I bet they will consider this more of a business dispute. Dave said it best in his column, "Getting tickets to the public at a fair price isn't just a business issue. Pop music is entertainment, but it's also culture. For a lot of us it's the most important culture, the only kind that speaks both to us and for us. By running up service charges, Ticketmaster, along with the venues and promoters that are its partners, are restricting access to this culture to those who can pay high premiums." 

Sources:

Marsh, Dave. "Ticket to Ride?" PLAYBOY, vol. 41, no. 11, November 1994, p. 52.

https://pitchfork.com/news/taylor-swift-fans-file-second-lawsuit-against-ticketmaster-over-eras-tour-debacle/

https://pitchfork.com/news/taylor-swift-concert-ticket-demand-culminates-in-ticketmaster-canceling-public-on-sale-date/

PLAYBOY: Axioms of the Mafia Manager

Digging through a trough of PLAYBOY articles, I came across one that lists management axioms, Mob style. Naturally, being in management, these axioms caught my attention and I've listed a few that I may or may not have used or witnessed. I've said too much.  

"

If you can't win by fighting fair, fight foul. Or have a third party do your fighting.

Teach your tongue to say, "I don't know."

If you must strike out at someone when you get angry, be careful not to strike yourself.

It is much better that your enemies think you are crazy than reasonable and rational.

Nothing weighs less than a promise.

If you must hurt a man, do it so brutally that you need not fear his revenge.

The only way to keep a secret is to say nothing.

In any venture, overvalue the negative estimate of your prospects by two. Undervalue the positive estimates by half.

If you must lie, be brief.

Some defeats are better than victories; unfortunately, some victories are worse than defeats.

Often you lose the bait when you catch the fish. This is a necessary loss.

The best armor is to keep out of range.

If you are forced to bow, bow very, very low. And hold that bitter memory until you take your revenge.

Never knock someone else's racket. (You never know when you may be pulling the same stunt yourself.)

You can't put a good edge on bad steel.

When you are angry, close your mouth -- and open your eyes.

Money is welcome even if it comes in a dirty sack.

If you don't spot the mark in your first half hour at the table, you're it.

Out of 15 who flatter, at least 14 lie.

If you are the anvil, be patient; if you are the hammer, strike.

For peace, be ready for war.

Let your adversary talk. When he has finished, let him talk some more.

Don't teach your soldiers all of your cunning, or you may fall victim to yourself.

Better that your enemies overestimate your stupidity than your shrewdness.

To deceive an enemy, pretend you fear him.

After a victory, sharpen your knife.

If others fold every time you bet a good hand, you play to their eyes.

No one dies twice.

Victories are always temporary; so are defeats.

The best theories often make the worst practices.

Many a difference can be resolved between the sheets.

"

Source: V. (January 1996, volume 43, number 1). Axioms of the Mafia Manager. PLAYBOY. 103.

Juan Rulfo

Photography Appreciation

Born on May 16, 1917, Juan Rulfo was a Mexican photographer and author of two very important literary works: Pedro Páramo (1955) and El Llano en llamas (1953). The primary subject of his works focused on the Mexican people and landscape. 

After his parents died, Rulfo was raised by his grandmother in Guadalajara, Mexico, and he grew up during the Mexican Revolution and Cristero war. 

After graduating primary school, he attended secondary in a seminary. He moved to Mexico City where he entered the National Military Academy. 

He attended Universidad Nacional Autónoma de México, where he began writing. He later advanced his career and traveled throughout Mexico as an immigration agent. This is probably where he had the opportunity to photograph what would then become a visual setting for his literary works.

Sources: Wikipedia, https://bristolatino.co.uk/art-focus-juan-rulfo-photography/